October 2025
🐰🐰 In Retrospect, What You Do Next Matters
The only constant is change...
We’ve all been there — replaying a moment in our minds on a loop. Wishing we’d spoken up. Or stayed quiet. Or walked away sooner. Or stayed longer.
Regret can be heavy. In therapy, it comes up all the time: “Why did I let it go that far?” “Why didn’t I see it sooner?” “I’ve wasted so much time.”
Here’s the thing. Those feelings make sense. They come from the part of you that knows you deserved better — from yourself, or from others. They also come from the part of you that wants to make meaning, to understand the story of how you became who you are.
From a psychodynamic perspective, we often carry the echoes of our earliest relationships and experiences into the present. We repeat old patterns before we even realize we’re doing it. We live out stories we didn’t exactly choose. And we learn about ourselves in hindsight.
That’s why I love this reminder:
In retrospect, what you do next matters.
Because once you see the pattern, you can make a choice. You can pause. You can write a new chapter. You can respond differently.
It doesn’t erase what came before — but it does change the ending.
And your story isn’t over yet.
So if you’re sitting with regret, or feeling stuck in an old pattern you don’t like, consider this your invitation to take a breath and ask yourself:
✨ What do I want to do next?
✨ What kind of story do I want to tell from here?
What you do next matters. You matter. And you’re allowed to grow in real time.
If you’d like help exploring the patterns in your story — and practicing new ones — therapy can be a great place to start. Feel free to reach out if you’re curious about how this kind of work might look for you.
I'm grateful to know you and I thank you for letting me be a part of your journey.
Helpful Numbers:
I recommend adding these to your contacts in your phone. If you don't need them, you might be able to share them with someone who does.
Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988
Text crisis line... you can send a text to 741741 and just write HOME and someone will get right back to you. https://www.crisistextline.org/text-us/
Trans Lifeline: (877) 565-8860
National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233
